N.I.C.E.

Much appreciated compliments from co-workers.

Cynicism seems like the way of the world these days. It could never be my way. Though I often lean towards being cynical, as defined in some ways, I am not "distrustful of human sincerity and integrity." If I was, I wouldn't trust myself. Even though I feel like I'm often in an environment filled with people who have embraced cynicism, I also believe that they have all the potential in the world to let that go. As far as myself, I like being a nice person. I'm a truly nice guy, always have been. And I usually finish first. I wrote these bars as some advice I'd give to my younger self:

"Nice guys don't finish last/
That's what weak guys say, who are not in your class/
You're a king, you're NOT a king, you're a king's advisor/
You're NOT A KING, you're WISER, you're A LEADER, A FIGHTER/
a BREATHER OF FIRE..."

A nice guy who finishes last is probably not nice enough to himself. Being kind begins with being kind to yourself. Allowing yourself the space to succeed. Putting yourself first so that you can enough for everyone else. Building up your internal strength so that your can manifest if externally.

Things like that.

Being nice is way tougher than being mean. It's easy to embrace your anger and negativity! It's hard to remain true to the gentleman inside in a world that seems to respect un-directed aggression. A real nice guy isn't weak though. A real nice guy is MLK teaching people to master their anger until laws were changed through that power. A real nice guy is Malcolm becoming so powerful after discovering the love of diversity that he became a threat to everyone, even his so-called people. Real niceness is dangerous in how disciplined it is. 

True niceness is fair and consistent, something most people aren't, which is why I get told and treated like I'm intimidating way more than a person who is always polite should be. This doesn't mean anger is without its place. Anger is necessary and powerful. I subscribe to the school of thought I once saw a sitcom dad share with his son who was fighting in school: "Don't waste your anger, it's too valuable!" You think some of the greatest nice guys in history weren't angry? Of course they were. Fire-breathing nice guys who knew how to use that energy to make others angry about important things. As a country, we still get angrier debating about our sports teams than debating about the state of our republic. The woman or man who can best spread their anger, and get the masses to take up the cause of it, often is in charge of change. This is true in the arts, politics, and the streets. Don't sleep on anger. Niceness and anger are fraternal twins.

True niceness is misidentified and misrepresented. I've heard Greg Popovich is one of the nicest guys when you get to know him and I can totally believe it when I actually listen to what he's saying. Niceness isn't about making you comfortable. It's about being in mastery of your negativity. Mastery of your negativity is some powerful stuff. A "face" in wrestling, a good face, is nice and powerful. He wins in the end by consistently keeping to his values and literally fighting for them. Fans don't like characters that come across as fake nice (John Cena) or weak nice (Roman Reigns), whether the guys playing the characters are like that or not. Sometimes, the fans realize they were wrong because you learn about people through experience (John Cena and Roman Reigns, again). I've had people totally disregard my presence when mistaking my niceness for weakness, until they got to experience me over a period of time and realize my power and intention. 

This doesn't mean everyone who is fair and consistent, and doesn't give in to their anger, is a nice guy. Batman is as fair and consistent as they come, but he isn't nice. He's a(n something that rhymes with grasshole). His discipline and code is a vice. Now Superman IS nice, but we don't like him as much as we like Bats, do we? Because Supes' niceness isn't human enough. We can relate to Bats, even though he's a billionaire. He lives out the ultimate "nice guy's revenge." Except nice guys shouldn't seek revenge. Revenge isn't justice. Batman should be in the Revenge League, not the Justice League. Either way, being nice still means being human, and flawed. 

Being nice has gotten me everything, and I don't think I could've been as successful if I wasn't. It's because I've harnessed a strong optimism, based on tried-and true-methods of dealing with people and attacking my goals. No mean person could put up the fight I have all of these years. I want you to remember that NICE should never, ever mean WEAK. N.I.C.E means "Never Internalize a Cynical Existence."